"Life is either a daring adventure...or nothing."

I hate change. Okay, too strong of a word for you? Greatly dislike, do not prefer, detest, would rather not have to deal with, it is not my favorite thing in the world. In plain English?

Don't like it.

I just don't like it. I always knew I didn't like it, but yesterday I realized how utterly deep my hatre- excuse me, great dislike for it is. You see a very terrible thing happened.

I lost my hairbrush.

Yeah I know that isn't so unusual. Especially for me, I lose things very often. But you have to understand, I liked my hairbrush, I use it a lot, it was exactly the kind I like, I'd had it for a while, it fit my head and my hand, it was perfect.

Then I lost it. You're going to laugh at me because of this, but it's true, I seriously went through some mental distress when I couldn't find my hair brush. It's not like there wasn't a hairbrush around, I simply borrowed Susie's for a couple of days, but it wasn't MY hairbrush.

After finally deciding the hairbrush was officially LOST, I bought a new one.

Which didn't solve anything. The new one was... well it just didn't feel right, it was too big, it felt weird on my head and it... was just not my hairbrush.

Now you all officially think I'm the most trivial person in the world. I just spent. 1...2...3...227 words talking about my anguish over losing my hairbrush.

Pitiful, I know. I do have a point, I promise.

The point is, I was upset because something steady in the life- namely my hairbrush - changed. This made me realize how much I don't like change.

We were watching You've Got M@il last night, Kathleen Kelly said something I thought was interesting: "People are always telling you that change is a good thing, but all they're really saying is, that something you didn't want to happen at all, has happened."

In some ways I really agreed. Find me someone who truly LOVES change and I'll faint. What human wants what they like to change?

The again (I say that a lot, has anyone noticed that?) what would life be like without change? Change is life, change from a baby to a adult, and then to, you know, an old person. Change from a carefree teenager to a "young adult" with responsibilities and a job and weird feelings and and expectations thrust upon you. I fit into this last category. It seems like yesterday I was a child,(and I'm sure a great many people reading this blog believe I am still a child) now I have a job, and like it or not, and I'm graduating this spring, and I have to think about higher education.

I have to grow up.

I'm immature, I'll admit it, I still clutch my baby blanket to me when I'm upset, I dearly love to sleep in on Saturday mornings, and yes, I will purposely avoid work because I'd rather read my book. But deep down inside, I don't want to grow up. I don't want to have to worry about bills and the economy and gas prices, I don't want to go to bed at the same time every night, because I'll always have a full day tomorrow, I don't want to read only textbooks because I don't have time to read anything fun. I'm not ready to give up on childhood ignorance. I don't want to have to think about all the unborn babies that die everyday legally, I don't want to think about the fact that with the way the economy is going I could not have a job next year. I want to still pretend that Mommy and Daddy will always work things out.

But I can't do that anymore because, honestly (sorry mom and dad) they can't fix everything anymore. I have to think about these things. I have to grow up, I have to mature, I have to... well, I have to change. If I planted my feet in right now, locked my bedroom door for 5 years, and refused to grow-up I suppose I might accomplish it, then maybe I'd be happy.

Then again (there I said it again) I'm sure I would be miserable, I would be a idiot 23 year old who couldn't face life, and therefore I would have missed out on every wonderful thing life does have to offer. Now I'd have to be a real idiot to do that, because growing up is something we all have to do but would like to put off. We know eventually it's going to be good for us but we don't want to do it. It reminds me of when I was learning to read. Boy did I put up a fuss! Everyone told me I would like, nay, love reading! I agreed with them and I knew, someday I would have to learn. Still I put up a big fuss while mom tried to teach me. Why? Because It was HARD.

Hard.
That was my only reason.
I simply did not want to out any effort into it.
How more selfish and self-centered can a person get?

Yes, I was a yellow belied coward. Now, if there's anything I hate being called, it's a coward. So, yes, I learned to read, and yes, I'm going to become an adult one of these days, mainly because I don't have choice, but also because I know that I know that I also disagree wit this quote, "People are always telling you that change is a good thing, but all they're really saying is, that something you didn't want to happen at all, has happened." Because weather we realize it or not, we want change, it's hard but we want it because we would be miserable without it, so in that essence, change can be, and is a good thing, Why?

Because there's a God, who, strangely enough, cares about me.

Yeah, little ol' me.

And he's declared that: "And we know that all things work together for good to them that love God, to them who are the called according to his purpose."(Rom 8:28)

Somehow all these things I greatly dislike will turn out okay because even though Mom and Dad can't fix everything anymore God still can. We won't always see how they worked out for good or understand, sometimes we do, I.E. learning to read was one of the best things that's ever happened to me, I understand that now. So if we understand it or not that promise is always there, it's a promise from God, and he doesn't break his promises. It's a nice thought.

Another thought I find comforting is that life is an adventure. Adventure means "an exciting or extraordinary event or series of events". Adventures consist of, for the most part, hard times, and fun. I like fun things, I don't like hard times. But hard times give us the fun, so if I do have to start worrying about the stock markets and gas prices I vow that I won't let those worry lines crease my face. I will make my way bravely through the hard times. If I do have to go to collage then I'm going to learn about something I like, something FUN! Because I think life is too short to live unfulfilled and God didn't create us to live life that way.

So even if I have to grow up I refuse, absolutely REFUSE to get somber and worried and old seeming. My life is going to be an adventure. I'm going to join Helen Keller in the belief that "Life is a daring adventure, or nothing."

The best part is? In my book adventures always have happy endings, because I have a God who cares about me.

You want to know what? I found my hairbrush (under a pile of clothes, where else?) Also, if you actually read this whole thing kudos for you! Thanks for listening.