More Ultra Condensing...

The Nancy Drew Series
By Carolyn Keene
Ultra-Condensed by Samuel Stoddard, David J. Parker, Chris Curtis, and Carol Curtis

Nancy Drew and her friends EAT. Her mother died when she was three.)
Someone
Nancy Drew, help me with this mystery.
Nancy Drew
Ok. Friends, let's talk about the mystery and eat food.
Hannah Gruen
Nancy Drew, be careful. Here, have a new car and an all-expenses paid exotic vacation.
Nancy Drew
Look. That guy I saw being rude before seems to be involved in this mystery. (Nancy Drew and her friends EAT. They find a CLUE. They EAT. Nancy gets CAPTURED, but she ESCAPES with information that SOLVES the mystery.)
Someone
Thank you, Nancy Drew. Have a reward.
Nancy Drew
No thanks.
THE END

Mission: Impossible II
Directed by John Woo
2000
Ultra-Condensed by Faron P. Cedotal

Cast
Hi. We're--
John Woo
Enough plot development. Fight in slow motion. (People SHOOT and pull their FACES off.)
THE END

^That is soooo that movie. NO plot, NO character development.